Nice guys. ❤️💐😃

Source: Conversation with Bing, 31/05/2023 .........

response to My question - 

Here is an essay I wrote for you:

**Why Nice Guys Finish Last and Why That Is the Best of All ?**

The phrase "nice guys finish last" is often used to describe the frustration of men who are kind, respectful, and caring, but fail to attract romantic partners. Some people may think that being a nice guy is a disadvantage in the dating world, and that women prefer men who are rude, arrogant, and selfish. However, this is not necessarily true. In fact, being a nice guy can be a great asset for finding long-term happiness and fulfillment in relationships. Here are some reasons why:

- **Nice guys are more attractive than jerks.** Contrary to popular belief, women do not find jerks more attractive than nice guys. Research has shown that women prefer men who are warm, kind, emotionally sensitive, and respectful over men who are cold, insensitive, aggressive, and disrespectful (Urbaniak & Kilmann, 2003) ². Women also value niceness more than physical attractiveness when looking for a long-term partner (Li & Kenrick, 2006) ². Therefore, being a nice guy can actually increase your chances of attracting women who are looking for a serious relationship.

- **Nice guys are better partners than jerks.** Being a nice guy does not mean being weak or boring. It means being considerate, supportive, loyal, and honest. These are qualities that make a good partner in a relationship. Nice guys are more likely to treat their partners with respect, listen to their needs and feelings, compromise and cooperate, and be faithful and committed (Urbaniak & Kilmann, 2003) ². Jerks, on the other hand, are more likely to be abusive, manipulative, selfish, and unfaithful. They may seem exciting and confident at first, but they often cause pain and disappointment in the long run.

- **Nice guys are happier than jerks.** Being a nice guy does not mean being unhappy or unfulfilled. It means being content, optimistic, and grateful. These are traits that contribute to happiness and well-being. Nice guys are more likely to have positive relationships, meaningful goals, and a sense of purpose in life. They are also more likely to cope with stress, adversity, and challenges in healthy and constructive ways. Jerks, on the other hand, are more likely to be unhappy, pessimistic, and resentful. They may seem successful and powerful at first, but they often suffer from low self-esteem, insecurity, and loneliness.

In conclusion, being a nice guy is not a curse, but a blessing. It may not guarantee immediate success in the dating world, but it can lead to lasting happiness and fulfillment in relationships and life. Nice guys may finish last, but they finish best of all.

Source: Conversation with Bing, 31/05/2023

(1) Do Nice Guys Really Finish Last? | Psychology Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/meet-catch-and-keep/201405/do-nice-guys-really-finish-last.

(2) Nice Guys Finish Last - Wikipedia. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nice_Guys_Finish_Last.

(3) Where Does The Phrase "Nice Guys Finish Last" Come From?. https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/62774/where-does-phrase-nice-guys-finish-last-come.

(4) The Psychology Behind The Saying “Nice Guys Finish Last”. https://datingskillsmasters.com/nice-guys-finish-last/.

Personal Disclaimer - Technical errors in certain premises. Judge for yourself to the best of your own ability.

It's not gonna be any easier for any of us tomorrow, SO ...

       A few days back I went for a jaunt outside. Which I'll tell you is a rare exercise for me. I had to pay my Mom's Airtel bill at North Sector Mall, Rohini, Airtel Office kiosk. I had decided to walk, so I walked and weaved my way through the chaotic bumper to bumper traffic that has become the norm everyday, even on our main road, not just on the Gurgaon-Delhi roads. I dodged two wheelers, loudly honking cars and scurrying pedestrians on the pavements and off on the road. 
       By the time I reached and crossed the crowded Madhuban Chowk and the Rohini Fire Station and beyond I was tired out, so I hired a cycle rickshaw. A nimble old man which made me feel guilty as he wove his way through the traffic with me as his passenger. He demanded Rs. 30 for less than a Kilometre, which I felt was less than he deserved in such a world. I paid the Airtel bill at the swank office and returned on the same fellow's rickshaw. I asked him if he was upto it since he was so much older than me. He replied,"Oh Son, don't feel guilty, it's my job." I just felt he was God-sent, if not God Himself. 
      By the time we reached back to Madhuban Chowk through the again bumper to bumper traffic and cars moving at no more than a pedestrian's pace and the rickshaw's pace, and a smart driver driving his bus over the pavement in order to get ahead of everyone, I realised it was pointless waiting for the traffic to move. I could walk faster. So I got down at Madhuban Chowk, paid him again Rs. 30 as he demanded, making me feel guilty again, I had just Rs.30 change left in my pocket, so I felt releaved.
       I crossed the chaotic junction, again wove my way through the blaring honking cars and weaving two wheelers and scurrying pedestrians and reached my apartment building.
       I entered the gate and was shocked !!! ... by the change, visual and mental that my society bore. It was an absolutely serene, peaceful, verdantly green and lushious, soberly coloured but happily coloured home, orderly and quiet within the wall of the society.
      We Ashianites, all of us, ought to be grateful, genuinely grateful for what we have in our home here, the serene environment, the ordered parking, the wide open spaces, the close knit community (which is undermined by our petty squabbles), and a committee today that is doing it's best and an exemplary job it is, (just as the previous committee did to it's best ability), to maintain our home Ashiana. 
        We all need to cooperate wholeheartedly with it to maintain peace and harmony in this ever changing chaotic world outside where survival is just going to get tougher notwithstanding the technological goodies that come out of it. 
        Our founders did an exemplary job and so did every committee that came after, to the best of their ability. 
       If nothing else, at the least a genuine expression of appreciation for the time and energy spent by the committee out of their schedules, to keep our home as liveable as physically and mentally possible is called for.  
      Not an appreciation as the master of deceit - Shakuni said about Krishna, "Let Him be God. ... So what ? ... I don't like Him. And what one doesn't like, one must praise." As Sadhguru said, "That's deceit."
       You are doing a good job, Present Committee. A genuine Thank You to You !

Lift your veil of ignorance you frog and see.

I wish I could study in Boston
I wish I could make to Yale
I'm Oh so jealous
of the few lucky ones
who make it to the land of the pale.
Who cares for the vast Indian Ocean
or our own mighty hill and dale
when I could have
for a few dollars more
a lifetime to regale
stories of the land of the man I so admire,
the land of the man so pale
Grass is greener in the pale man's land,
Acknowledge that, you frog in the well.

Oh I wish I could study in Boston
Oh I wish I could make to Yale
Oh I wish I could be blessed by
the touch of the man so pale.

Good luck ! :D !
Ha Ha ! :D !
...and all the best ! :D !
with love from,
              Frog in The Well ! :D !

New York !!!

When the railroad rumbles
under My feet underground
I wonder why the world is so good
Why We Men made
what We made
not knowing whether it would
...be there to carry
all the love Our Spirits held
across thousands and millions of miles
of dust, dirt and space
And hold Our Universe together
in embattled times
as We hoped and knew It should !!!

NAMO for girl child !

MODI WON !!!
What a relief !!!
Even if I were to perish now at anyone's hands, India, My Motherland, My Beloved Motherland will win. HA HA !!!
:D !!!
Thank Thee, Appe Almighty !
Thou answered.
Thou answered ! 
I am saved !
We are saved !
That sweet baby downstairs is crying :) !
This world is good.
Thou art Good !
It's still worth bringing a child into this world, into My Hindustan, after all. Especially a girl child.

                                             Badrinath, 1990.

A Thought about India from Amachi's Window.

As I look out of Amachi's window at the street and the marketplace opposite us, what do I observe ? - 
That India is - Every sort of energy in every direction.
It always was, it is so and it always will remain so ! No other country, I believe, will ever be able to match us at this. And for this reason India will never be boring. It will always be intriguing, thrilling, even exasperating, but never never never Boring. Never boring like a uniformed regimentalized society, or a dreadfully sanitized sanatorium, or a trite place to live in, or a sickeningly perfect and pretty manicured garden. And this character can not be emulated for it is inborn.

From the Pundits hurrying about on their sacred duties early morning on the street, to the Muslim vendor peddling his wares on a pushcart. From the Bania Uncle, fat and flamboyant, stepping out of his Pajero :), to the poor ragged tramp sleeping undisturbed on the divider amongst the shrubs in the middle of the main road while the traffic and people lumber on alongside. From the shining Metro rail zooming past on the elevated corridor, to the emaciated rickshaw puller struggling to push at his rickshaw's pedals, dragging his heavy passengers along. From Bansal Sweets (Amritsar Wale, Pure Ghee Sweets), to The Premsay confectioners (Cakes and pastries).
From the middle aged man opening his zipper, pulling out his ... and peeing right into our face at the boundary wall of our housing society in full-front public view, to the fine young lady who walks past behind him, unperturbed by the sight, just ignoring him. Why ? Even that middle aged woman who comes and squats behind the bushes at that same spot every morning.
From the constant sirens of the patrolling Police (PCRs), the hurrying Ambulances (Neonatal Care), the Fire Tenders on their drills, to the silent still moments of the night or even of Sundays. From the raucous children, screaming and shouting excitedly in their buses travelling to their picnic spot (Japanese Park, Rohini), the groups of young girls and boys bantering as they casually walk to their study centres with their files under their arms, to the bent-over elderly couple (retired Professor and his wife) going to see their married daughter and grandchild on their early morning stroll. From the ipod ad at the Titan Timepoint, to the local lingerie store- Kanchuki next door. From the shiny Green Chick (chicken shop), to the tehlewala preparing tandoori rotis for his poor as well as rich customers on the street. From the bright and shining houses and shops of the Capitalistic serving the rich and the poor, to the Socialist products (DDA flats) in dilapidated conditions.
From the chaotic, noisy traffic outside, to the (relative :)) calm and quiet peace within our housing society.

This is CRAZY INDIA for you !
As I said once -
INDIA = Every sort of energy in every direction !
and INDIA not = Boring, ever !

AMEN ! :D !

... and there's much much more !

What about India, Bharat my home, my Mother? My Beloved?

She's-

• devout
• moral
• authentic
• simple
• true
• down to earth
• honest
• earthly
• earthy
• worldly
• transcendant
• spiritual
• upright
• family loving
• affectionate
• universal
• scientific
• mathematical
• imaginative
• passionate
• sensual
• sexy
• witty
• strong
• resilient
• hopeful
• dreaming
• hard working
• caring
• beautiful
• ancient
• learned
• intelligent
• wise
• evernew
• evergreen
• holy
• sacred
• melodious
• musical
• rythmic
• brave
• free
• non-interfering
• epic
• mythical
• legendary
• commonsensical
• stupid at times
• sometimes exasperating
• Forgivable  :) !!!
• artistic
• creative
• visual
• insightful
• rugged
• rustic
• rough
• young
• deep
• profound
• real
• rational
• original
• delicate
• sensitive
• tolerant
• accomodating
• friendly
• loyal
• loving
• fiery
• pacific
• a mela
• a garden
• mountains
• plains
• rivers
• cities
• villages
• towns
• forests
• deserts
• seas and ocean
• understanding
• cooperative
• interactive
• open
• egoistic in the right sense of the word
• centred
• faithful
• polite
• gentle
• human
• masculine
• feminine
• farsighted
• perfect
• imperfect
• growing
• playful
• fun loving
• colourful
• rich textured
• rich
• poor
• middle class
• suffering yet striving
• patriotic
• proud
• humble
• complete
• incomplete
• multifaceted
• diverse
• catholic (as in Universal)
• Hindu
• respectful
• respecting
• lovable
• brotherly
• slow
• lumbering
• challenging
• anchoring
• anchored
• living
• eternal
• infinite
• family
• ritualistic yet grounded
• silent
• noicy
• calm
• chaotic
• intricate
• detailed
• vast
• grand
• visionary
• intuitive
• . . .  ! ! !
• D I V I N E !!!
  and T R U E L Y  H A P P Y ! :D !!!

Pencil sketch- THe U and The Me (1988-89 DCOA) at the (Old or New Delhi ?) Railway Station, Delhi, by Jeffry Jose Payyappilly.